Okay! So, today I wanted to touch on this subject. I took a Instagram poll this morning and the results were kind of wild to me but at the same time, I kind of already knew. More than half of people say that they feel their friends and family don’t support their journey to weight loss.
What made me think of this? I realize whenever I post about my journey on my personal Facebook page, almost nobody comments or likes it. Sometimes, zero. It makes me feel really stupid. I’m like wow, nobody freaking cares. Lol. But when I post on IG, I get so many reactions from total and complete strangers who are supporting me, encouraging me and applauding me. It makes me feel so good and honestly has given me motivation to keep going whenever I was feeling down or I wanted to give up.
It was the reason that I started my @myadventuretofit IG in the first place. I tried and failed publicly on my personal Facebook probably 20+ times. So maybe, people were sick of hearing about it. Maybe they just already knew the ending and thought I should quit talking about it and just do it. I DON’T KNOW. I remember my FIRST Instagram post I wrote which was a I AM STARTING MY JOURNEY post, it got over 60 likes. 60 likes from people I didn’t know and never met. I was overly excited like WOW these people believe in me! If strangers believe in me, then I need to believe in me!
As far as our own family, this is a tough one (sigh). I grew up in obesity. The majority of my family on both my mom and my dads side has battled obesity my entire lifetime. I think partially, most of them just accept it and think this is the body they were given and they just have to embrace it. It’s actually a crock of ****. I remember believing that too. In 2016, for the first time in my life I came to terms with the fact that I was obese, my entire family was obese and this is just my genetics, so deal with it. That year, I gained 30 more pounds and my highest weight ever. Do I believe obesity is genetic? Yes. For one reason only, I have friends who eat 5000 calories every day and are not active at all and have never been over 120 pounds. Is that because of anything other than genetics? No. For my body type, I have to work my *** off to lose weight AND to maintain. So clearly, there’s different body types. Do we have to work harder than some? Absolutely, but that does NOT mean it can’t be done.
That’s where the family not supporting you comes in. I have had a lot of people with siblings and parents say their family members roll their eyes every single time they decide to try and lose weight again. Trust me, I’ve experienced this too. I’m here to tell you, that used to be enough to make me not want to try. It was the assisting that voice in your head going “why are you doing this, you know you’re just going to fail again like usual”.
Why do they do it? Two reasons:
1) I TRULY believe one reason they do it is because they don’t want to see you succeed. Does this sound bad/over the top? YES, but hear me out. I don’t believe it is intentional on their end. I believe that subconsciously they find you trying to better your life a threat. If you do it and succeed, then they have no excuse because ACTUALLY, IT CAN BE DONE. People don’t want to see that right in front of their face. They want to believe the 5 million excuses they have in their own head and you proving all those excuses wrong, confuses them. It proves a point that they think they had all figured out.
2) They love eating bad and want you to be a part of it. A lot of people really enjoy eating junk food because it’s freaking delicious. I know, I get it. A lot of people eat as a social thing. Hey, lets go out to eat. It’s something to do. If you go on a diet that restricts your eating like crazy, then you are going to be less likely to want to go out to eat with them, thus upsetting them. This one is difficult. I’ve been on both sides of this. The side of having restrictions and not wanting to go out – and then the other side of my family/friends not wanting to go out to eat with my because their diet/cleanse. I KNOW it’s annoying sometimes. BUT, you HAVE to be supportive. It doesn’t matter if you believe they’re going to fail/succeed or not. THEY’RE TRYING, so support them in their effort!
At the end of the day what it comes down to is that fact that IT DOESN’T MATTER. The lesson I learned was to STOP discussing it with others. Don’t give yourself an excuse to give up. Telling others is an easy way to get knocked down. I have discussed in my diet group and there is one thing I now know for sure…THE SECOND you start a diet, automatically the people around you find the fault in it/become wannabe doctors. Whole 30? Bad. Paleo? Bad. Keto? Bad. IIFYM? Bad. Whole Foods Only? BAD. 21 Day Meal Plan? BAD. Dairy Free? BAD. Gluten Free? BAD. Drinking a set amount of water per day? BAD. Opinions are like *** holes. Everyone has one. Stop feeling the need to discuss your journey with others unless they are a medical professional. PERIOD.
THIS IS YOUR JOURNEY. DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU. TUNE EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE ELSE OUT.